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Cube (1997)
3/10
Bad acting galore
11 February 2020
When I watched this film 20 years ago, I liked it. 20 years and many films later, I do not think it is a good movie anymore, mainly because of the atrocious "actors". The concept is good, but the execution is terrible, for example the dialogues. If we do not learn who built the cube and what for, and why those people are in it, the whole story is pointless. Also, that two of them are such maths geniuses (one of them even autistic) is just too convenient - and boring. Pity.
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10/10
Funny as Hell!
6 February 2020
Why is this film rated so low? It is ridiculously funny and, for a B-movie, very well made! Obviously, the low ratings come from people who take it seriously. Is it not evident from the film poster that it is a silly movie? I laughed very hard, and think it is Bruce Campbell's funniest film.
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God's Pocket (2014)
10/10
Wrongly listed
3 February 2020
I think the low ratings come from this film being listed as "drama, crime". In reality, it is a black comedy. It is superbly acted, and from the middle it gets weirder and funnier. Also, because the first half is less funny and does look a bit depressing, I suspect some viewers do not bother to watch the whole film, turning it off in the middle. Pity. Or they do not understand/like black comedy. I laughed a lot!
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Frailty (2001)
1/10
Do not ever direct yourself!
31 January 2020
It hurts, because I actually liked Bill Paxton. This film shows that (apart from being a bad director) he can be a bad actor too. In fact, most actors in this film were bad, especially the older boy. I just cannot believe Bill Paxton is a religious man, but this is what this film suggests, since, instead of showing the father as an insane Christian fundamentalist, it does the opposite. It turns out the dad was right: God, angels and demons do exist, God really commanded the dad to kill demons and it is good to lock a kid (his own son) in a cellar without water and food, in order to make him believe in God. Also, the film makes little sense because it does not show how the dad became such a fundamentalist. It does not show him once in a church, or reading the Bible or praying. Out of the blue, the dad starts to have visions and receive messages from God. Worse: the dad does not question these visions, his own sanity, like a normal person would do. He accepts the will of God straight away, as if killing demons (people) were the most natural thing in the world. And then that voice-over narration, telling everything we see happening. Terrible.

Unfortunately, not good.
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1/10
Typical good beginning bad ending movie
16 January 2020
Production value is high. Geoffrey Rush is very good, as always. Donald Sutherland too, but 100% wasted. The film starts off really very well, but then, from the moment Rush sees the woman that was hiding, it gets painfully slow and boring as Hell, and turns into an unbelievable melodrama. The ending is totally predictable. In the middle of the film, I even got angry, because I really liked the beginning. If I knew it would turn out to be a not so great film, I would not have wasted my time.
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1/10
Overrated
30 December 2019
Too many flashbacks (got really very annoying), too brutal (unnecessary violence) and many things were not believable or did not make sense, but, most importantly, the main character was not likeable. How can you root for her, when she, for example, almost kills an old lady (turning her into a cripple) who treated her nicely?

Pity, because I really wanted to like this film.
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1/10
Awful (and I loved The Wicker Man)!
26 December 2019
It is hard to believe this film is from the same director of The Wicker Man (1973), which is a wonderful film, actually a masterpiece. The Wicker Tree is full of bad acting and boring as Hell. It is not a bad film in the sense that it can make you laugh (some bad movies are so bad that they are funny): it is just plain bad. When I saw that American wearing a cowboy hat in Scotland, I knew this film was going to be bad. And I was right.
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The Brood (1979)
10/10
Very scary!
24 November 2019
Why is this film rated so low? It is very well made, and scary! All parts are well played, and the score is fantastic! They do not make films like this anymore.
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1/10
Pathos galore
12 September 2019
Too sentimental, too pathetic, too slow, too conventionally made, and the voice over explaining everything ruins it completely, making it boring as hell. By far the most overrated film of all times.
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1/10
Zero
11 September 2019
It was on TV, so I started to watch it. At first, I could not remember having watched it before, so I was kind of happy. But then I remembered that I did watched it, also on TV, when I was maybe 10 years old, and that it scared the hell out of me, only that today, some 40 years later, it looks like a bad parody. This film is so bad that it even made me laugh many times. Everything in it is cheap, and the story is ridiculous. It even has the worst ending in the history of cinema!

PS: If you are planning to time travel to the year 3955 AD, do not worry: people and apes will speak exactly the same English as today.
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Prevenge (2016)
3/10
Pity
29 August 2019
Pity because I like Alice Lowe as a comedian a lot. History of cinema has shown that it is not a good idea to be at the same time writer, star and director of a film, especially when it was shot in just two weeks. Unfortunately, this film does not know what it wants to be: a drama, a parody, a black comedy or a horror. Camera work is a bit poor, and there is some bad acting, even by Lowe. This movie is not terrible. It is just not as good as it could have been, given that Lowe is very talented.
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Unfriended (2014)
1/10
15 seconds
18 August 2019
I stumbled upon this "film" on TV. When I started to watch it, it was showing someone filling empty fields on Facebook. The most boring 15 seconds of my life. I turned it off.
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Four Lions (2010)
10/10
Daring, provocative, important and hilarious
14 July 2019
"I may ask you to blow yourself up, but I will never ask you to piss in your own mouth."

Why is this movie so little known? In addition to being very funny, it is also very important for the times in which we live.

Only critique is that sometimes it is hard to understand the dialect they speak. I do not know if there are copies with English subtitles. I watched it on Vimeo.
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Horrible Histories (2009–2019)
10/10
Only 1 star for the second part though.
22 June 2019
At some point, the actors were replaced. Unfortunately, the new actors are really very bad. Awful actors actually. The second part of this series (I call it like that because of the new actors) is not at all funny. With their bad acting, the new cast simply destroyed this wonderful series. :-(

But the first part (the one with the original cast) is just amazing. Superbly well acted and funny as hell!
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10/10
What is wrong with you people?
1 June 2019
I have not watched the previous movies of this Rec3 thing. So I thought this one was very good, very well made and acted. It is black comedy, and I laughed many times. Maybe the makers should not have released it as a sequel of this Rec3 thing, then people would not compare it to the previous movies, and the ratings would be much higher, since this is what this movie deserves.
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1/10
Poor
6 May 2019
I watched it only because it was on TV, and there was not anything better to watch. This is one of those kinds of movies you have to be from the place where they were made in order to like them. I am not from Scotland, so I did not like this movie, but the main reason was the acting, which is mostly poor, and sometimes over-the-top. Add to that that the story is unbelievable. The mad policeman can do whatever he wants, and nobody does anything to stop him, either physically or legally. When he speaks, everybody just stands there and listens. Come on! And the mutual stabbing in the end is laughable. Well, there is a reason why I had never heard of this film before.
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10/10
Delicious comedy!
14 April 2019
People who give this movie a low rating have no sense of humor. It is a very entertaining film, everything you would expect from a spaghetti western. Sometimes it is even hilarious! Grab your popcorn and enjoy.
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Cape Fear (1991)
1/10
Laughable
5 February 2019
This movie damages De Niro's reputation as a good actor. Totally over-the-top and caricaturistic. His fake Southern accent was terrible even for me, who am not American. Max Cady (De Niro) has superpowers, he can do anything and is unkillable. He can even travel hanging from the chassis of a car for hours. Jessica Lange is annoying, Nick Nolte, who normally plays bad-ass guys, is stupid and weak and Juliette Lewis tries so hard to play a teenager that the girl she portraits looks retarded. And the ending? Impossible not to laugh.
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The Thing (1982)
1/10
Juvenile B-movie
29 November 2018
Very slow and talky. Acting is bad. You know acting is bad when actors stand around and every time someone says something they stair at each other. The whole film relies solely on the few scenes with the transformation of the alien creature, which are too gross to be scary. Why would an alien travel to Earth just to be buried under ice for 100.000 years and turn into grotesque monsters that are good for nothing? Additionally to being badly made, this movie is meaningless.
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Antropophagus (1980)
1/10
Not scary at all!
26 November 2018
There are movies that are so bad that they are good. This one is just bad. It is unbelievably dull, the camera work is horrible, the acting is terrible and the gory effects are so cheap that they are laughable. If it were not for its dullness, it could well be shown as a horror movie parody. Really: it is one of the worst films ever made.
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Bullhead (2011)
1/10
Nominated for the Oscar?
20 November 2018
I watched this movie because it was on TV. People here who call it a masterpiece have obviously never watched a Ingmar Bergman film.

Rundskop is overlong, dark, depressing, and about a man who walks around like a drunk Frankenstein's monster, heavily sweating and puffing and beating people up - and everybody sees that as normal. Not even a beautiful young woman thinks he is repulsive.

Sorry, but not only is this movie no masterpiece, it is also nothing special.
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Secretary (2002)
10/10
James Spader!
14 November 2018
This is a very good movie, although 15 minutes to the end it almost gets ruined, but fortunately just almost. All actors are extremely good, especially James Spader, who is at his best. What an actor!

People who bashed it here did it because they do not like the different, the weird, the twisted. I am not into SM, but I do not judge. I liked this movie because it is so well made. And yes, it is comedy: black comedy - mixed with drama and romance.
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The Chase (1966)
1/10
Biggest problem: there is no chase.
13 November 2018
Overrated movie. Painfully slow and full of over-the-top performances in irrelevant and not believable subplots. Marlon Brando's facial expression is the same from beginning to end, he cannot speak properly and does almost nothing.

It is a movie about a town where everybody is stupid.
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3/10
Overrated.
6 November 2018
Yes, I am a fan of Jerry Lewis - for what he represented to me as a kid. That time, I simply adored him.

As a kid, this movie scared me, and as an adult I find it boring. Even a comedy needs a believable story to be good. This movie, however, is way too silly. Too many things are wrong, like why anybody would like Buddy Love so much, when he clearly is just an assh*le. There are not many funny scenes, and the funniest ones are in the beginning.

Bottom line: not Lewis' best, but still watchable.
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1/10
Why is a superstar like Ethan Hawke in this?
5 October 2018
I have no idea why Ethan Hawke accepted to play in this movie. Maybe because he is a friend of its director? The reason I am saying this is because this movie is very amateurishly made. Camera, lighting, direction. It is dark, dull and depressing. And then the story: it just does not know where it wants to go. What is this movie really about? We do not know even how Hawke's character was able to become a priest, since he evidently has no talent. The worst part: the ending. Predictable and laughable.
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