I think everyone involved with this film used it as a means to get a paid vacation out of the producers. My favorite thing about this film is Robert Duvall's wig-which looks like it is sewn together out of a paint brush (Sonny Crockett's dad meets Sherwin Williams).
Hotel Colonial (1987)Warning-some spoilers
17 February 2004Warning: Spoilers
After seeing this I can't understand why any of these actors would have agreed to be in it. The story, essentially, is about Marco going to Colombia to recover the remains of his brother who has supposedly committed suicide. The brother is a former Italian terrorist who has been avoiding extradition. Much of this film seems at odds with itself. The music contrasts jarringly with the subject matter; the story seems to careen around with a mind of its own; the accents are ridiculous; and there doesn't seem to be any direction from the director. The three main characters are supposed to be Italian, and are played by Savage, Duvall, and Ward. Savage is as much a Gringo as ever-he doesn't even bother to attempt to be Italian, Duvall seems to be confused as to who his character is and ends up with some sort of Spanish accent (even in scenes where he drops his false persona), and Ward's native Brit accent keeps undermining whatever it is she's trying to affect. There is no point to this film.
Marci X (2003)Ben Affleck & Jennifer Lopez should be grateful...
7 October 2003
...for one simple reason-they aren't responsible for the worst movie ever made anymore. Weak set-ups fizzle into non-humor and bland plot scenarios roll downhill slowly toward the expected conclusions. It's sort of like staring at traffic for 90 minutes-you tune out the cars and the noise and start thinking about being anywhere else.
Transformations (1988)WOW this is bad.
9 May 2003
There is nothing redeeming about this film. First you have to get past the fact that the main character looks exactly like Barry Manilow. Then try to ignore the bad acting-and even that is boring. I can usually get a laugh out of it, or at least the cheesy effects, but here it just seems like a bunch of robots bump into each other on screen for about 90 minutes. Forget the plot-this movie is about Interstellar STD's. One last question: Whose 12 year old kid designed the sets?