Obvious Child (2014)
Jenny Slate: Donna Stern
Donna Stern : I remember seeing a condom; I just don't know exactly what it did.
Donna Stern : I can't believe he walked into the store. That's a sign.
Nellie : And that would be a sign saying?
Donna Stern : Like, that I'm a present in a box, and that he and I should go and start our beautiful life together.
Joey : You know, I'm not a straight guy...
Donna Stern : [sarcastically] Oh what?
Joey : ...but my guess is that most of them would hate that gift.
Donna Stern : What? You're saying that a guy doesn't want a drunk, pregnant girl in a box?
Nellie : If you're a serial killer.
Joey : Maybe you wanna tell him.
Nellie : No. Why? Why? You don't owe him anything. You don't even know this guy.
Donna Stern : Maybe he just deserves to know that, like, this happened. That I'm not psycho, and I'm going to get an abortion.
Joey : You know, if I got someone pregnant, I would wanna know.
Donna Stern : If you got someone pregnant, I would also want to know.
Joey : Probably every newspaper would want to know, 'cause all of a sudden, some dude's mouth would be pregnant.
Nellie : My God, you guys, stop it with the crazy jokes. Why do you care what he needs to know or not? You are the one who has to get this procedure, pay for it, wear the fucking pad with the big wings, okay? You think if he was pregnant, he would be worrying about you right now? No, he'd be trying to get that fucking thing out of his body. God damn it! You guys, we already live in a patriarchal society where a bunch of weird old white men in robes get to legislate our cunts. You just need to be worrying about yourself. And why are you looking at me like that, you little bitches?
Joey : Everything you're saying is valid, but you are scaring my dick off.
Donna Stern : I did the first scream for screaming, and then the second scream I had from scaring myself from the first scream.
Donna Stern : It's like the one place where I can go and wear my diaper and feel that I fit in.