Dr. Marcus: [Ari and Mrs Ari discuss Terrance's buyout offer with the marriage therapist, and the real reason comes to light after Mrs Ari mentions Terrance, Adam Davies, and Lloyd] Is it true? Do you want to destroy these people, Ari?
Ari Gold: Okay, yes, if could *gouge out* Terrance McQuewick's eyeballs and eat them for what he did to me, I would! And I would sell that Benedict Arnold Adam Davies into white slavery if we lived in a place that had a market for it. And LLOYD, that little queen, who I welcomed into my home and allowed to play with my children and care for my dog and who left me for those two scumbags, I would tie him up and allow the entire Screen Actors Guild to anally rape him if not for the fact that I'd know he would enjoy it. I hate 'em all, and yes, I want to see them destroyed. But *that* is not why I want this company. I want, no, I *need* this company, because it's good business. It's good goddamn business and if I don't buy it, someone else will and that will be very very bad for my business. And my wife, of all people, should know, that when it comes to business, my judgment is never clouded, so please...
[pleads to Mrs Ari]
Ari Gold: Please, support me like you always have, and I will deliver for us, like I always have.
Dr. Marcus: So, what do you think?
Ari's Wife: I think that was a good speech.
Dr. Marcus: Yeah.
Ari's Wife: Do what you need to do, Ari.
Ari Gold: Really?
[Mrs Ari nods]
Ari Gold: I love you.
[Kisses Mrs Ari]
Ari Gold: [to therapist] Can we fuck in here?
[leaving a message on Vince's answering machine, Matt is trying to recruit Vince for a charity]
Matt Damon: Vince, this is Matt Damon. Listen, I just had a really disturbing phone call with the foundation. It's been over a week, I'm in Haiti at the moment, and I understand your check has not come. It has not come, Vince? Don't you fucking push me, Vince! Don't push me, send the check! You do what's right, Vince. You gave me your word, you gave LeBron your world. Let me tell you something man, I never even thought you were a fucking good actor; I thought you were terrible. Aquaman? Queens Boulevard? They stink, they fucking stink. I can't even believe you have money to give to a foundation, but the fact is that you DO, and you gave me your word that you would! So GIVE ME THE FUCKING CHECK, VINCE! I can't believe I have an Academy Award and I'm calling you back! Again and again and again, you COCKSUCKER! SEND ME THE CHECK!
Turtle: [Turtle just landed in Auckland after breaking up with Jamie] You have any idea how quickly I can get to Rome?
Flight Attendant: Sir, we just landed from Los Angeles.
Turtle: Oh yeah I'm trying to break the Guinness World Record for most miles traveled in a 24 hour period!
Ari Gold: [At the TMA offices, Ari has just terminated Adam Davies and several other employees at paintball gunpoint, and is now looking for Lloyd] Now where's Lloyd Lee?
Black Employee: Mr Lee knew you were coming, Mr Gold. He decided that he will not wait for your arrival.
Ari Gold: Now why don't I believe you?
[shoots upward then walks somewhere else]
Ari Gold: Now Lloyd, maybe you're not here, maybe you are. Either way, you have nothing to fear, because I'm not gonna kill you. I love you! You see even though you betrayed me, you were the best slave that I've ever had. I mean, who could possibly replace the way that you picked up my dry cleaning? No one! Who could better the way you picked up my dog shit, and if I liked short, fat men sucking on my dick, I'm sure that no one could do it better than you either. So, return to the king, or exile yourself from this town forever! You have until the end of the day tomorrow to agree to be rebranded *mine*!
Agent #2: [Ari on the loose terminating agents with a paintball gun] I represent Jon & Kate Plus Eight.
Bono: Get off your arse, Vince.
Matt Damon: That's Bono, Vince.
Vincent Chase: Oh, uh, hey Bono.
Bono: You know, it doesn't take much to have a big effect here, Vince.
Vincent Chase: Yeah.
Matt Damon: I'll tell you what - when you finish your Frank Darabont movie, I'm gonna take you on a trip, okay?
Vincent Chase: Yeah, for sure.
Matt Damon: In the near term, I would like a check.
Vincent Chase: Oh... kay, for how much?
Matt Damon: Do what's right, Vince!
Bono: Don't be a cheapskate, man!
Matt Damon: Do it today, okay? Don't make me wait; I will be waiting.
Bono: We'll both be waiting.
Ari Gold: You know what I'm looking forward to, Terrance?
Terrance McQuewick: No, what's that?
Ari Gold: Walking through this place Terminator style and eradicating all the deadweight.
Terrance McQuewick: Well, unlike you, I have a soft heart.
Ari Gold: Hahaha, soft as a diamond.
Ari Gold: Listen, you crawled over here for a reason. What is it?
Terrance McQuewick: I want to make this deal work.
Ari Gold: Well then I suggest you go find a buyer who will let you push them around, 'cause it ain't gonna be me.
Terrance McQuewick: I want you to buy it.
Ari Gold: Why? Because you miss having some sort of control over me?
Terrance McQuewick: Listen, I'm smart enough to know that I never had control over you.
Ari Gold: No, not while I was working for you, or shall I say with you. I was your number one asset; we used to laugh at all those other dickheads, but you became one when you threw me out of the company that *I* built!
Terrance McQuewick: Look, let's put the past behind us. The future's yours; don't destroy my legacy out of spite.
Ari Gold: Admit that you destroyed me out of spite, out of bitterness, and out of jealousy.
Terrance McQuewick: Is that what all this is about, you want me to apologize? Poor, hurt little boy still pines for his daddy's approval?
Ari Gold: I became too big for you and you couldn't handle it.
Terrance McQuewick: No, I couldn't handle your rotten ego, or your extraordinary salary demands!
Ari Gold: Bullshit!
Terrance McQuewick: So, this is why you won't let me keep my name?
Ari Gold: If you don't like it then you can go find someone else.
Terrance McQuewick: I don't want anyone else. You're the only one who can take this company forward for the next fifty years.
Ari Gold: Well then apologize.
Terrance McQuewick: I just did.