"Weeds" I Am the Table (TV Episode 2008) - Plot Summary Poster

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  • An impromptu lunch date for Nancy and Esteban ends in a hail of gunfire; Celia seems to have developed a dependency on Xanax; Silas tells Lisa what he grows, and Lisa offers him use of her shop as a cover; acting on advice from Cesar, Shane carries out a preemptive strike at his new school; Doug and Andy's Coyote business attracts some unwanted attention; as their dream date continues, Nancy learns more about Esteban's appetites and desires.


The synopsis below may give away important plot points.


  • (The title card this time is a school crossing sign.)

    At the house, Nancy's in bed when the contractors come in to do the bathroom. Shane doesn't want to go to school. He points out Silas doesn't have to. "You're our one shot at legitimacy," she tells him. He's going to grow up and be a "doctor or a lawyer or a business executive" (from the Malvina Reynolds song that used to be the opening credits - nice).

    There's a knock at the door. Shane thinks it's his copper pipe. It's Cesar, Esteban's goon. Her presence is requested right away. They drop Shane off at school in a limo - with Mexican plates. She gives him money for lunch. "Can't I do drug things with you guys?" he says. Cesar predicts Shane will get his ass kicked.

    At Celia's house, Isabelle wakes up her mother and demands to be taken to school. Celia pops a Mexican Xanax. "Maybe I'll walk," says Isabelle.

    In the desert, Andy the coyote feeds immigrants matzoh crackers. "This is what my people ate in the desert, for 40 years," he explains.

    He tells them to check their travel kits. Breath mints, a book and games for entertainment. He notices the tree they're sitting under has women's underthings in it. An immigrant explains it's a rape tree. The clothes belong to women who were violated under it. Andy suggests the relocate to an area that's a little less "rape-y."

    At the cheese shop, Silas hangs out with his older girlfriend, Lisa the mom. He tries to talk her into selling sandwiches. She goes in the back and pulls out her adorable tiny bong and takes a hit. She talks gourmet while Silas takes a toke. He asks why she's smoking that stuff if she's so into gourmet. "It's like the Cheez Whiz of pot," he tells her. She finds out she's been "f---- a teenage drug dealer." He corrects her. He's a grower, and they make love. He shares his product and she's a convert.

    At Esteban's office, Guillermo and Nancy meet with him. Esteban recaps last week's events, including the news that Guillermo wants to kill Nancy. His request is denied by management. Guillermo is dismissed. Nancy is asked to stay for lunch.

    At the maternity shop, Celia is zonked out on Xanax and lets a woman shoplift under her nose. A man from the smuggling operation in the back comes out and chastises her for letting criminals into their business. That's the third time today.

    He tries to sober her up, giving her something to snort. She's tingly. But ready for work.

    Waiting on the border, Doug checks with the Minutemen border patrol guy.

    Andy waits with his charges on the other side. He has a Moses moment as he tells them to be a free people and they race across. Doug radios in that there is not a "bean on the tortilla; no spic, all span" as the new immigrants race to his minivan.

    In the back, Davenport gets out and gives them each ball caps, telling them they're a baseball team. Doug passes out fliers, looking for Maria. Doug and Andy congratulate each other on a job well done.

    At lunch, Nancy clears up the lesbian thing with Esteban, saying she was only one around Guillermo because it made it easier to be friends back when they were friends, before he wanted to kill her in front of her children.

    She excuses herself to go to the restroom. She dawdles to paint a lipstick mustache on a campaign poster of Esteban's in the bathroom. A burst of gunfire rings out and she hits the deck.

    When it's over she walks out to see total destruction in the restaurant. Esteban's men are there, guns drawn. He tells the restaurant owner he'll pay for everything. His guys want him to leave, but he wants to stay and finish their lunch. He's calm, she's shaken.

    At school, Isabelle and Shane have found each other and are trying to survive school. Shane asks someone who the most popular guy in school is. The kid points out "Dan." Shane goes over and introduces himself. Dan responds nicely, sticking out his hand with what seems like sincerity. Shane responds by whacking him in the face with his lunch tray, telling him: "Don't f--- with me."

    At the maternity store, Celia is super charged, very excited about her job. Running around, helping customers. She runs in the back to check on a shirt in a different color, or just really to get another snootful.

    Nancy wants to know who was trying to kill Esteban. Could be any number of people. She tries to figure out what he's afraid of. Snakes? No. Heights, maybe.

    Nancy's afraid of calm. The storm she can handle.

    Andy and Doug bid farewell to their baseball team of immigrants. Davenport chokes up a little at leaving. He now plans to go to Florida. They hug him good-bye. They reassure themselves they're doing god's work and providing the backbone of the economy. "They paid you, right?" Doug asks. Oops.

    Celia goes in back for another snort, but she's cut off until she pays up. She goes to the register and takes all the twenties.

    At the cheese store, Lisa has a thought. About cheese. About how it smells. How it smells more than anything else. She takes Silas to her big back room, wondering if anyone might want to rent it. "You really don't want to make sandwiches, do you?" Silas says.

    Esteban leads Nancy somewhere. To see a lion he has caged somewhere. Right. Because that's a natural part of a date. The lion's bound for his zoo. Someone brings in a goat, not bound for his zoo. Bound to be lunch. He tells her she might not want to watch. He enjoys it. As horrific sound effects ensue, it's clear she does, too. And, as the next scene proves, the power and fearlessness are clearly turn-ons.

    Cut to naked Nancy with the mayor/drug lord and some really ferocious sex. When they finish they're all scratched up and there's blood on the sheets.

    At a bar somewhere, the man Andy shot in the knee hears a story about the coyote named "El Andy." He limps out, determined.

    Nancy leaves Esteban's, walking back through the drug tunnel, scratches all over her back.

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