The Avengers (2012) Poster


Clark Gregg: Agent Phil Coulson



  • Agent Phil Coulson : [via phone]  Mr Stark, we need to talk.

    Tony Stark : You have reached the life model decoy of Tony Stark, please leave a message.

    Agent Phil Coulson : This is urgent.

    Tony Stark : Then leave it urgently.

    [Coulson enters Stark's penthouse, hanging up his cellphone] 

    Tony Stark : Security breach.

    Tony Stark : [to Pepper]  That's on you.

    Agent Phil Coulson : Mr Stark.

    Pepper Potts : Phil! Come in.

    Tony Stark : "Phil?" Uh, his first name is "Agent."

  • Agent Phil Coulson : You're at 114 Solenski Plaza, 3rd floor. We have an F-22 exactly eight miles out. Put the woman on the phone or I will blow up the block before you can make the lobby.

    [Luchkov, intimidated, puts the phone between Natasha's ear and shoulder] 

    Agent Phil Coulson : We need you to come in.

    Natasha Romanoff : [tied to a chair]  Are you kidding? I'm working.

    Agent Phil Coulson : This takes precedence.

    Natasha Romanoff : I'm in the middle of an interrogation. This moron is giving me everything.

    Georgi Luchkov : [to his cohorts]  I don't... give everything.

    Natasha Romanoff : Look, you can't pull me out of this right now

    Agent Phil Coulson : Natasha, Barton's been compromised.

    Natasha Romanoff : Let me put you on hold.

    [Phil patiently holds while Natasha whips butt] 

  • Thor : We on Asgard pretend that we are more advanced, but we, we come here battling like Bilgesnipe.

    Agent Phil Coulson : Like what?

    Thor : The Bilgesnipe, you know; huge, scaly, big antlers. You don't have those?

    Agent Phil Coulson : Don't think so.

    Thor : They are repulsive, and they trample everything in their path.

  • Natasha Romanoff : [on the phone]  Where is Barton now?

    Agent Phil Coulson : We don't know.

    Natasha Romanoff : But he's alive?

    Agent Phil Coulson : We think so. I'll brief you on everything when you get back. But first, we need you to talk to the big guy.

    Natasha Romanoff : Coulson, you know that Stark trusts me about as far as he can throw me.

    Agent Phil Coulson : Oh, I've got Stark. You get the big guy.

    Natasha Romanoff : [realizing he means Bruce Banner, stops dead in her tracks]  Bozhe moi.

    [Russian for 'My God'] 

  • Agent Phil Coulson : You're gonna lose.

    Loki : Am I?

    Agent Phil Coulson : It's in your nature.

    Loki : Your heroes are scattered, your floating fortress falls from the sky... where is my disadvantage?

    Agent Phil Coulson : You lack conviction.

    Loki : I don't think I...

    [Coulson shoots Loki with his BFG, causing Loki to be blown through the wall behind him] 

    Agent Phil Coulson : So that's what it does.

  • Pepper Potts : Come on in. We're celebrating.

    Tony Stark : Which is why he can't stay.

    [flashes Coulson phony smile] 

    Agent Phil Coulson : We need you to look this over as soon as possible.

    Tony Stark : I don't like being handed things...

    Pepper Potts : [cuts Tony off]  That's fine, because I love to be handed things.

    [Pepper exchanges her champagne glass for Coulson's tablet] 

    Pepper Potts : So, let's trade.

    [She takes Tony's champagne and gives him the tablet] 

    Pepper Potts : Thank you.

    Tony Stark : [to Coulson]  Official consulting hours are between 8 and 5 every other Thursday.

  • [In a Quinjet, Agent Coulson walks to Steve Rogers who is seated and looks at Bruce Banner's file on his laptop] 

    Steve Rogers : So this Doctor Banner was trying to replicate the serum that was used on me?

    Agent Phil Coulson : A lot of people were. You were the world's first superhero. Banner thought gamma radiation might hold the key to unlocking Erskine's original formula.

    [Steve watches the footage of the Hulk's attack on the Army at Culver University and the Hulk roars with fury as he slams a jeep apart] 

    Steve Rogers : Didn't really go his way, did it?

    Agent Phil Coulson : Not so much. When he's not that thing though, guy's like a Stephen Hawking.

    [Steve looks puzzled, not understanding the reference] 

    Agent Phil Coulson : He's like a smart person. I gotta say, it's an honor to meet you, officially. I sort of met you, I mean, I watched you while you were sleeping. I mean, I was... I was present while you were unconscious from the ice. You know, it's really, it's just a... just a huge honor to have you on board.

    Steve Rogers : Well, I hope I'm the man for the job.

    Agent Phil Coulson : Oh, you are. Absolutely. Uh... we've made some modifications to the uniform. I had a little design input.

    Steve Rogers : The uniform? Aren't the stars and stripes a little... old-fashioned?

    Agent Phil Coulson : With everything that's happening, the things that are about to come to light, people might just need a little old-fashioned.

  • [Nick Fury goes over to the fatally-wounded Coulson] 

    Agent Phil Coulson : I'm sorry, boss. The god rabbited.

    Nick Fury : Just stay awake. Eyes on me.

    Agent Phil Coulson : No. I'm clocked out here.

    Nick Fury : Not an option.

    Agent Phil Coulson : It's okay, boss. This was never going to work... if they didn't have something... to...

    [Agent Coulson looks away and sighs his last breath. Nick Fury looks on grimly at Coulson] 

    Nick Fury : Agent Coulson is down.

    Unknown SHIELD Agent : Paramedics are on their way.

    Nick Fury : They're already here.

    [Maria Hill listens on her headset, as do Captain America and Iron Man from another room] 

    Nick Fury : They called it.

  • [Nick Fury and Dr. Bruce Banner shake hands] 

    Nick Fury : Doctor, thank you for coming.

    Bruce Banner : Thanks for asking nicely. So, uh... how long am I staying?

    Nick Fury : Once we get our hands on the Tesseract, you're in the clear.

    Bruce Banner : Where are you with that?

    [Nick Fury turns to Agent Coulson to explain, while Natasha Romanoff eyes an image of Clint Barton on a computer screen] 

    Agent Phil Coulson : We're sweeping every wirelessly accessible camera on the planet. Cell phones, laptops. If it's connected to a satellite, it's eyes and ears for us.

    Natasha Romanoff : That's still not gonna find them in time.

    Bruce Banner : You have to narrow the field. How many spectrometers do you have access to?

    Nick Fury : How many are there?

    Bruce Banner : Call every lab you know, tell them to put the spectrometers on the roof and calibrate them for gamma rays. I'll rough out a tracking algorithm based on cluster recognition. At least we could rule out a few places. Do you have somewhere for me to work?

    Nick Fury : Agent Romanoff, would you show Dr. Banner to his laboratory, please.

    [Natasha nods and walks off, leading Banner down the hall] 

    Natasha Romanoff : You're gonna love it, Doc. We got all the toys.

  • [from trailer] 

    Agent Phil Coulson : What do we do?

    Nick Fury : We get ready.

  • [from trailer] 

    Agent Phil Coulson : [to Hill]  I think we need to time-out.

See also

Release Dates | Official Sites | Company Credits | Filming & Production | Technical Specs

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