[an old woman, actually Randy wearing a wig and some makeup, walks up to Monk and Sharona at the homeless shelter's serving counter]
Adrian Monk: Oh my god!
Sharona Fleming: [seeing through the disguise] What are you supposed to be?
Lt. Randall Disher: I'm undercover. I'm homeless.
Sharona Fleming: What's that on your face?
Lt. Randall Disher: Dirt.
Sharona Fleming: [to Monk] Give the lady some gravy.
[Monk does so]
Julie Parlo: [walks up to Stottlemeyer] Excuse me, Captain Stottlemeyer?
Julie Parlo: Hi, I'm Julie Parlo. Uh, where is the FBI? This is a kidnapping. I happen to be a lawyer, so I know that in a kidnapping situation the FBI has jurisprudence.
Lt. Randall Disher: That's only true if your grandmother's been taken across the state lines...
Captain Leland Stottlemeyer: ...or if she's been held for more than 24 hours. And I think you meant to say "jurisdiction." What kind of lawyer are you?
Sharona Fleming: [8:27] Are you OK?
Lt. Randall Disher: She has a cat.
Sharona Fleming: Well why don't you tell her to bring it upstairs?
Lt. Randall Disher: No. No. It doesn't matter. If the cat's been in the house in the past year I can't stop sneezing.
Sharona Fleming: Really? Remind me to buy you a cat.
Sharona Fleming: [11:30] This is crazy. What kind of ransom demand is this?
Adrian Monk: I know. The kidnappers are risking life in prison for what, $500 worth of food? I mean, the shelter on Third is serving turkey tonight, anyway.
Sharona Fleming: Well, we can't stand around here like this. We don't exactly blend in.
Adrian Monk: Do you have a suggestion?
Sharona Fleming: This is crazy.
Adrian Monk: It doesn't matter. I'm getting my badge back.
Sharona Fleming: I'll believe that when we see it. Julie Parlo didn't exactly seem like supreme court material.
Adrian Monk: Gravy?
Bearded Man: No thanks.
Adrian Monk: Everyone else is having gravy.
Bearded Man: I don't like it.
Adrian Monk: Why don't you have a little gravy?
Sharona Fleming: He doesn't want any gravy.
Adrian Monk: I think the gentleman can speak for himself.
Bearded Man: I don't want any gravy.
Adrian Monk: OK, enjoy your meal.
Julie Parlo: [20:18] This is Adrian Monk & Sharona Fleming. This is my study group, Edie Rusher, Tom Burton, & Sascha Gordon.
Sharona Fleming: Are you studying in Spanish?
Tom Burton: Oh, yeah. I'm taking the next bar exam in Peru. It's all true or false down there.
Adrian Monk: Doesn't that mean you'll only be able to practice in Peru?
Tom Burton: Oh, geez.
Sharona Fleming: Do any of you have any professional experience yet?
Julie Parlo: Well we've done a lot of pro bono work.
Sascha Gordon: Last year we assisted in two death penalty cases: Sal Dickersen & Bill Jansen.
Adrian Monk: Dickerson & Jansen, weren't they...?
Sascha Gordon: I miss them every day.
Edie Rusher: That's how you learn: by making mistakes. Now we know if you're filing a stay of execution, you have to take into account daylight savings time.
Tom Burton: The law is hard, Mr. Monk. All these books, hmm? And there are more upstairs.
Adrian Monk: Um, about my reinstatement. You guys definitely talked in person to professor Eugene Emory?
Julie Parlo: Absolutely. Here's his notes right here. Professor Emory said it can't fail.
Adrian Monk: It can't fail.