Nothing But Trouble (1944)
Mrs. Elvira Hawkley: The last man I had stayed for several years. He'll tell you I was most accommodating. In fact, I still get letters from him. He's on an island somewhere in the Pacific. I think they call it Alcatraz.
Mrs. Elvira Hawkley: I thought a little spot of this might refresh you before taking up your new duties. It's Chateauneuf 1924.
Stan: Gee, that's pretty old. Haven't you got anything new?
Oliver: I have the secret recipe for the famous Steak à la Oliver.
Oliver: I don't think there's a job open in this whole country.
Stan: Say, why don't we try some other country?
Oliver: Stanley, I think you've got a good idea.
French Restaurateur: [scolding in French] ... Un Bifteck à la Olivier! Allez!
Stan: What'd he say?
Oliver: You heard what he said.
Stan: I heard what he said but I didn't hear what he meant.
Oliver: He simply said that he accepts our resignation.
Oliver: Yonder she lies, Stanley. The good old USA!
Stan: Gee, I'm glad to be back.
Ocean Liner Passenger: I'll bet you are. What did the Japs do when they took you prisoner?
Oliver: It was most humiliating. They forced us to prepare dinner. My masterpiece: Steak à la Oliver.
Ocean Liner Passenger: Gee, that was tough.
Oliver: Tough? My masterpiece? I beg your pardon!
Stan: After they finished eating it, they told us to please go on home.
Oliver: Yes, it seems that they preferred some dish of their own. I think they called it: Hara-Kiri.
Mrs. Elvira Hawkley: I do hope you'll feel thoroughly rested after this little snort eh, snack.
Prince Saul: Your majesty truly has great feeling for the common people.
King Christopher: God must have loved the common people; because, he made so many of them.
Prince Saul: An interesting; but, unsettling doctrine.
King Christopher: Oh, it's not my doctrine. It's Abraham Lincoln's.
Mrs. Elvira Hawkley: Don't forget the caviar. I usually keep a large supply on hand; but, that would be hoarding. I don't believe in hoarding. Do you, Oliver? Neither does Stanley, does he? And, Oliver, I want you to get me the biggest, finest sirloin steak you can find! Here. Here are the ration points I've been hoarding. I mean, I've been saving them, for weeks. They're the red points, you see. Pretty, aren't they?
Boy's Football Team Captain: Get away, pantywaist! This gang'd bust ya in half.
Boy's Football Team Captain: It'll give us three minutes more to try for a touchdown, won't it? If we don't let him play, we're licked right now.
Boy's Football Team Captain: Let's fool 'em. We'll give the ball to pantywaist, here, off left tackle. You think you could do it, kid?
King Christopher: You bet!
King Christopher: You're awfully kind.
Oliver: Well, we just like to see kids have fun.
Stan: Yeah, we think kids are nice.
King Christopher: And I think you're swell!
Oliver: Well, here's another nice mess you've gotten me into. I've got to fix a steak dinner and I haven't got any meat!
Oliver: Stanley, we've got to uphold the rights of human beings. That beautiful sirloin steak is enough for at least four people.
Stan: And he's hoarding it.
Oliver: Mrs. Hawkley needs it more than that lion. We'll do it!
Stan: You're right, Ollie. Ladies first, I always say.
Oliver: Stanley, get the meat.
Stan: You mean - me get the meat?
Oliver: Of course! Reach in and take it! Well, there's nothing to it. All you have to do is look the lion straight in the eye. Lions are afraid of that. I - I read that in a book.
Stan: But, did the lion read the book?
Oliver: No. Don't annoy me with trifles. Hurry!
Stan: Are you sure he'll be frightened?
Oliver: One look at you and he'll be terrified! - - - Did you look him in the eye?
Stan: Yeah, but, something must have gone wrong. I got frightened.
Oliver: Oh, I can't depend upon you to do anything!
Oliver: I have it! I'll decoy him away from the meat, you grab it. I'll pretend that I'm another lion.
Stan: It's working! Pretend you're a lady lion.
[Ollie gives a high-pitched roar]
Oliver: Now, I've got to think of another idea.
Stan: What are you going to do now?
Oliver: I'm going to tickle him. That'll attract him away from the steak. Then, you snatch it.
Stan: Suppose he's not ticklish?
Oliver: All lion's are ticklish! Gootchi-gootchi-gootchi-gootchi!
Stan: Why don't you try and find his funny bone?
Oliver: Gootchi-gootchi-gootchi! Gootchi! Gootchi-gootchi! See, he's laughing! Gootchi-gootchi-gootchi-gootchi-goo!
Stan: Don't look like a laugh to me.
Oliver: I can't understand why my Mock Turtle Soup à la Hardy isn't done yet?
Stan: Well, you know how slow those turtles are.
Mrs. Elvira Hawkley: I'm sure that you'll see that everything is served nicely. Won't you?
Oliver: You can trust me, Madame. Everything will go like greasy lightening.
Mrs. Elvira Hawkley: Oliver, you better saw the stea- I mean, carve the steak, in the kitchen.
Stan: [after answering the door] There's a guy by the name of Mr. Ronetz. He wants to talk to a Mr. Highness.
Prince Saul: Oh, that's my Secretary. Would you pardon me a moment?
Mrs. Elvira Hawkley: Oh, certainly.
Mrs. Elvira Hawkley: How did this - this ragamuffin get in here?
King Christopher: You know, Mr. Stanley, Mr. Oliver, this has been the happiest day of my life!
Oliver: Look, Chris, you don't have to say Mr. to us.
Stan: Of course not. Just call us Stan and Ollie.
Oliver: After all, we're pals.
Stan: Chris, you ain't a King?
King Christopher: I - I should have told you.
Oliver: Your Majesty.
Stan: Your Majesty.
Prince Saul: His Majesty will be pleased to grant you an audience at a later time.
Stan: Oh, sure, Chris.
Oliver: Thank you, your Majesty.
Stan: Mr. King, Chris.