A dark force threatens Alpha, a vast metropolis and home to species from a thousand planets. Special operatives Valerian and Laureline must race to identify the marauding menace and safeguard not just Alpha, but the future of the universe.
A veteran tracker with the Fish and Wildlife Service helps to investigate the murder of a young Native American woman, and uses the case as a means of seeking redemption for an earlier act of irresponsibility which ended in tragedy.
The last Gunslinger, Roland Deschain, has been locked in an eternal battle with Walter O'Dim, also known as the Man in Black, determined to prevent him from toppling the Dark Tower, which holds the universe together. With the fate of the worlds at stake, good and evil will collide in the ultimate battle as only Roland can defend the Tower from the Man in Black.
Robbed of his birthright, Arthur comes up the hard way in the back alleys of the city. But once he pulls the sword from the stone, he is forced to acknowledge his true legacy - whether he likes it or not.
With his reputation in tatters after a painfully unsuccessful delivery of a distinguished Japanese client, former triple-A executive protection agent, Michael Bryce, two long years after the disgraceful incident, is now reduced to a mere second-class bodyguard for hire. Under those circumstances, Bryce would do anything to prove his worth once again, and as a result, it won't be long before he accepts an offer from Interpol to escort the renowned international assassin Darius Kincaid from Manchester to the Hague. The task seems simple: Bryce only needs to transport the contract killer from point A to point B, nevertheless, Kincaid, as the only one with the guts and enough hard evidence to testify against a tyrannical Belarusian dictator, is an obvious target, while the trip to the Netherlands is long and hazardous. Without a doubt, this a race against the clock as the mismatched duo will have to put aside their grudges, in a non-stop concerto for bullets. Written by
The positives: It does have a handful of jokes that land well.
The negatives: Most of the jokes fall flat.
None of the actors have any chemistry with each other and the performances range from bad to decent. Salma Hayek's character in particular is unbelievably annoying. she plays a stereo-typically loud Mexican woman who screams a lot (in Spanish of course, because that's apparently supposed to be funny).
The story is beyond forgettable. Stereotypical bad guys are trying to kill the good guys. They also try to make the viewer care about the romantic relationships, but it's too forced and it just ends up being a waste of screen time.
The people working on this film didn't know how to work with lighting. The shots with windows in the background were particularly annoying to look at, because of how poorly they handled the lighting.
TL;DR 5/10 don't watch it.
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